It's just not fair.

Just like when you were a kid, it's not fair that _______ . Fill in the blank.

#1 life lesson: it's not fair.

J-bird has been dealing with Crohn's Disease for more than half of his life now, and has already endured one very scary and painful surgery from which he almost didn't recover. He doesn't remember Goose's life as a newborn. I think at times he only remembers the birth because it was so emotionally charged and well-documented. Crohn's has taken a lot away from him, from us.

And now, here we are less than 3 months away from welcoming Baby Boy, and we are preparing for another major surgery due to Crohn's Disease. Yes, it's not fair, but it's our life. Our life, more than J-bird's life alone. We're all in this together.

So at just 30 years old, we're talking with surgeons about how to save as much of his small intestine as possible so he doesn't develop short bowel syndrome and die sooner than he should. Most 30 year olds don't have to deal with this, and don't have to consider what will happen if they have to keep having surgery after surgery and how they will talk to their kids about it. And most 30 year olds don't have to think about what would happen if, God forbid, they really didn't have much time left, if their spouse didn't have much time left to be their partner. None of us know how much time we have, and how much time we will have with our other half, but dealing with a major illness brings all that fear and uncertainty to the fore.

We can keep saying, "It's not fair," but it won't change anything. We can dwell on the negative and get so mired down in the sadness and the anger that we can't see straight, but we are choosing not to do that.

We have a good life. WE HAVE A GOOD LIFE-- TOGETHER. A house, a beautiful daughter, a son who will be here in October. And we have experienced more love together than some people will ever get the chance to have. We are immensely blessed despite this terrible disease. And we must focus on enjoying every day that we have together, as a couple and as a family, for it's all a gift.

Please pray for us in the coming days and weeks. Pray for peace, for healing, for long-term good health for our family, for many years together. 


  1. You are so right girl..as a family, we are all very very blessed, but we also all have a lot of "not fair" things as well. However, I am proud to be part of a family that is so blessed in knowing we should never wallow in our self pity, but stand strong as individuals, as family, as people that love one another. God has blessed us all in so many ways and I pray that we all never take that for granted. I am praying for you and J and the babies, that you have understanding and strength in these times and that you rest your faith on the only one who can be in control of this situation. We love you guys so much!!

  2. I'm so sorry you all have another difficult surgery to endure surrounding another baby's birth, as if that isn't hectic enough! I will be praying for J's strength, your courage and strength, and Goose's love and snuggles to abound more than her wild side of playfulness while her daddy recovers! If there is anything I can do to help, don't hesitate to ask!